Multiple reasons why I broke this story into three segments: First, I was three posts behind when I started this post a day challenge; Second, each of the events have a sizable amount of time separating them; and Third, I thought it was be fun to write a series.
Here it is, the conclusion of this mini-series.
Part 3 - Our first date(s)
As the seasons pass, so did the time, and both of us thought the other was happy in the relationships that we found ourselves in. What we both went through separate relationships, they both crashed and burned. By Dec 2002, we were both single, and had healed from the broken friendships and engagements. Wait, sorry, only I was engaged. Caitlin talked about marriage with her boyfriend, but those conversations progressed from "When we get married" to "If we get married." I was rather callous when I broke off my engagement, but I'm glad I did. I read that you shouldn't avoid breaking up because you're trying to figure if it's going to hurt or not, because it is going to hurt either a little or a lot. And the longer you hold on, the worse it gets.
Then came the Christmas season of 2002. As mentioned earlier, my sister still kept moderate contact with the Tolleys, even though she had been married for five years at this point, and not to their son. Caitlin's mother was working at the LDS Bookstore in town at the time, and my sister was in doing some Christmas shopping. As women are wont to, they got to talking, and somehow or another, I was brought into the conversation. "How is Steven? Did he get married?" "No, he broke that off." I'm sure the discussion was a bit more involved than that, but when it was indicated that I was again single, a plan was hatched. Okay, phone numbers were exchanged, and my sister 'encouraged' me to call Caitlin and ask her out. She was nineteen now, so I wasn't quite as taken aback as I was approximately two years ago. Still, it took me a good few days before I called up Caitlin and asked her out to the Odyssium on Jan 4, 2003. I figured it would be a good first date where we could get to know each other more than sitting in a movie theatre for a couple of hours. Also, I really wanted to go see the touring exhibit about medical technologies which was going to be finishing up that month.
Immediately after I finished my phone call with Caitlin, I called up my sister. At this point she was down south in Lethbridge for Christmas holidays, so I left a message on her answering machine that was something like this: "Just called to let you know I finally called Caitlin and asked her out. I hope you're happy!"
My sister called me the day she got back into the city, January 6, 2003, and she asked me how the date went. I simply replied, "Which one?"
After I had left my puzzling message on her answering machine, Caitlin called me back, and invited me out to her family's New Year Day Medieval Feast. I said yes, not know what I was getting myself into, but that day I got a ride down to Beaumont courtesy of Dave Pratt (who earned the well deserved Best Man spot at the wedding) and then I was taken to the costume closet where I was given peasant attire. This attire included tights. Wrapped leggings, but they were still a form of tights. Caitlin was impressed that I put up with that, and that I stayed in costume for the entirety of the evening.
We then made plans to get together the next day, a simple dinner party at Dave Pratt's place, where we watched Bandits, and then the day following that, we were chez Tolley again, this time for a dinner party and round of Shanghai.
The Odyssium date went really well, and by the end of these dates, we had exchanged email addresses, as Caitlin was heading back to Red Deer College.
We wrote every day, and the day I proposed...
Is a story for another time.
Saturday, January 08, 2011
How I met my wife - Part 2 of 3
Part 2: When we first met
A lot can happen in a year, and even more happened during the three and a half years between the time when we first saw each other, and the first time we officially met. For instance, I went on a mission, and Caitlin finished high school.
Then came the auditions for 'The Ark' in January 2001. This I remember in a bit more detail since it was the day I consciously remember meeting Caitlin. I took note of her during the dance audition, and noticed that she held herself in fine form. She went off to the south end of the gym at the Institute building, where the audition was being held, and went to study her song for the singing portion.
Gathering up all the courage I had inside me to talk to this pretty girl, I walked up to where she was studying away. I'm not sure how long I stood there before I determined that she wouldn't know I was there unless I said something, but moments like that tend to stretch out even if they are only a few seconds. I didn't realize this at the time, but I surprised her quite a bit when I said, “Hi.” Her head shot up like I shouted her name and it made me do a double take before I asked her what song she was working on. In hindsight, I guess that's not really good practice for auditions as some actors prefer not to be disturbed. At all. Nevertheless, this was my first audition, and I didn't know any better, while she didn't know anyone and didn't expect to talk to anyone at the audition, let alone me.
I wasn't the most attractive guy in the world, but I wasn't that bad either, and that might have added to her surprise that I spoke to her. At least I'd like to think that. Our topic of conversation moved beyond music and we got to taking, about what I don't remember, but at the same time, it doesn't matter. She had to leave midway through the audition as she had a previous engagement.
When her mom came to pick her up, she noticed that I was sitting beside her, and asked who I was. She replied, “He said his name was Steve,” and that set off a little reminder in the back of her mother's head. After some telephone calls and talks with my sister, I found out that the Caitlin I talked to at the audition was Caitlin Tolley, and she was going to be coming to the Singles Ward pretty soon. I was surprised with that, and asked how old she was.
Imagine my shock when I discovered I was flirting with a seventeen year old.
As you might have noted, this is part 2 of 3, and the introduction to the conclusion of this story is summarized with the two words that were used to segue Part 1 and 2: Time passed.
To be concluded at 2:00PM
A lot can happen in a year, and even more happened during the three and a half years between the time when we first saw each other, and the first time we officially met. For instance, I went on a mission, and Caitlin finished high school.
Then came the auditions for 'The Ark' in January 2001. This I remember in a bit more detail since it was the day I consciously remember meeting Caitlin. I took note of her during the dance audition, and noticed that she held herself in fine form. She went off to the south end of the gym at the Institute building, where the audition was being held, and went to study her song for the singing portion.
Gathering up all the courage I had inside me to talk to this pretty girl, I walked up to where she was studying away. I'm not sure how long I stood there before I determined that she wouldn't know I was there unless I said something, but moments like that tend to stretch out even if they are only a few seconds. I didn't realize this at the time, but I surprised her quite a bit when I said, “Hi.” Her head shot up like I shouted her name and it made me do a double take before I asked her what song she was working on. In hindsight, I guess that's not really good practice for auditions as some actors prefer not to be disturbed. At all. Nevertheless, this was my first audition, and I didn't know any better, while she didn't know anyone and didn't expect to talk to anyone at the audition, let alone me.
I wasn't the most attractive guy in the world, but I wasn't that bad either, and that might have added to her surprise that I spoke to her. At least I'd like to think that. Our topic of conversation moved beyond music and we got to taking, about what I don't remember, but at the same time, it doesn't matter. She had to leave midway through the audition as she had a previous engagement.
When her mom came to pick her up, she noticed that I was sitting beside her, and asked who I was. She replied, “He said his name was Steve,” and that set off a little reminder in the back of her mother's head. After some telephone calls and talks with my sister, I found out that the Caitlin I talked to at the audition was Caitlin Tolley, and she was going to be coming to the Singles Ward pretty soon. I was surprised with that, and asked how old she was.
Imagine my shock when I discovered I was flirting with a seventeen year old.
As you might have noted, this is part 2 of 3, and the introduction to the conclusion of this story is summarized with the two words that were used to segue Part 1 and 2: Time passed.
To be concluded at 2:00PM
How I met my wife - Part 1 of 3
Those of you that follow my other blog have heard the story I told about The Canadian Coffee Secret, which was part and parcel to the post a day topic for Jan 6, 2011. Truth be told there was another story that I wanted to tell, an some people might have heard it before. For those who know this story, you'll probably want to read it anyway just to see which details I embellish more than others.
Part 1: The first time we saw each other
When people talk about their significant others, sometimes you'll hear the phrase, "Love at first sight." Not the case for my wife and I.
Going back to the time before iPods, when people listened to CDs and cassette tapes, my sister met this tall drink of water named Erik Tolley. Their relationship didn't last long, which disappointed my mom, because she thought Erik was great, and his family was fun too. Yes, our families met, however it wasn't a prominent enough even that I remember every detail about the visit. I don't even remember when it was. But if someone had told me that I was going to marry their fourteen year old daughter someday, I would have died of shock. Caitlin doesn't really remember much of that get together either, but the thing that stands out was the player piano. My mom enjoyed it so much, a couple of years later she bought one for the house.
Oh, and the dogs. I remember the three Old English Sheepdogs, or walking balls of hair. They knew they weren't allowed in the front room, but Chief was cheeky to the point that he would sit outside the room with one of his front paws over the threshold. He was out of the room, so he wasn't being yelled at, but he was in the room, so his mischievous nature was sated.
Like I said, I remember the visit, and Caitlin must have been there, but I don't remember her specifically. Besides, there would have been more than a few eyebrows raised if a 19 year old showed interest in a 14 year old.
Now to segue into the next chapter: Time passed.
Part 2 to be posted at noon o'clock.
Part 1: The first time we saw each other
When people talk about their significant others, sometimes you'll hear the phrase, "Love at first sight." Not the case for my wife and I.
Going back to the time before iPods, when people listened to CDs and cassette tapes, my sister met this tall drink of water named Erik Tolley. Their relationship didn't last long, which disappointed my mom, because she thought Erik was great, and his family was fun too. Yes, our families met, however it wasn't a prominent enough even that I remember every detail about the visit. I don't even remember when it was. But if someone had told me that I was going to marry their fourteen year old daughter someday, I would have died of shock. Caitlin doesn't really remember much of that get together either, but the thing that stands out was the player piano. My mom enjoyed it so much, a couple of years later she bought one for the house.
Oh, and the dogs. I remember the three Old English Sheepdogs, or walking balls of hair. They knew they weren't allowed in the front room, but Chief was cheeky to the point that he would sit outside the room with one of his front paws over the threshold. He was out of the room, so he wasn't being yelled at, but he was in the room, so his mischievous nature was sated.
Like I said, I remember the visit, and Caitlin must have been there, but I don't remember her specifically. Besides, there would have been more than a few eyebrows raised if a 19 year old showed interest in a 14 year old.
Now to segue into the next chapter: Time passed.
Part 2 to be posted at noon o'clock.
Friday, January 07, 2011
How do you stay focused?
Seems ironic that I stalled my car twice driving into work while today's post a day topic questions what you do to stay focused. On a side note, next time I use my FM transmitter, I'm going to have it set up before the car starts moving. Doing anything at a red light except watching for the light to change just doesn't work the way it should.
I like it when my wife rides with me, because she's able to take care of other things like answering the phone, work the radio, run the windshield wipers, basically anything that would distract me from driving. Another side note, my wife really does run the wipers while I'm driving. It's a bit of a carry over habit from our old car in which the wipers would stop wherever they were when you turned them off. If they were in the middle of the windshield, that's where'd they stop. She could gauge when to turn off the wipers much better than me. Mostly because her attention wasn't divided with driving the car.
When I was writing NaNoWriMo, I would have to put in earplugs in order to concentrate, but I would also have to wait until my daughter was asleep. Right now, I'm trying to write this while on my lunch break, and normally I'm the only one in the lunch room. Set apart from everyone else, nice and quiet, it's pretty easy to concentrate. Today, I just have to ignore the conversations that are going on around me, and try to focus more on what my fingers are relaying to the screen.
It's not that I'm being rude, I'm just trying to focus on my goal of getting a post written everyday. True, the coworker that is distracting me the most is talking about TV shows that I'm sort of interested in, and haven't had time to watch. Now that I've heard the summary I probably won't watch it now. Wonder if I was ever going to take time out to watch Supernatural. The series is still going? I thought it was done with Season 5 when they got the rings from the four horsemen. Oh dear, I just asked my Newfie coworker to explain something. This could take awhile. Ah, he's talking with another coworker now, perhaps he won't notice me getting back to my writing.
Crap. Another coworker just walked in. I'm going to have to finish this later.
Today's lunch break just wasn't as quiet and serene as usual.
What's this? The forecast is to be cold, stormy, and miserable? For the next three days? This could work to my advantage! Just need to get some playtime with my daughter to wear her out, and then I'll be able to sit down and write. For select periods of time.
I'll take what I can get.
I like it when my wife rides with me, because she's able to take care of other things like answering the phone, work the radio, run the windshield wipers, basically anything that would distract me from driving. Another side note, my wife really does run the wipers while I'm driving. It's a bit of a carry over habit from our old car in which the wipers would stop wherever they were when you turned them off. If they were in the middle of the windshield, that's where'd they stop. She could gauge when to turn off the wipers much better than me. Mostly because her attention wasn't divided with driving the car.
When I was writing NaNoWriMo, I would have to put in earplugs in order to concentrate, but I would also have to wait until my daughter was asleep. Right now, I'm trying to write this while on my lunch break, and normally I'm the only one in the lunch room. Set apart from everyone else, nice and quiet, it's pretty easy to concentrate. Today, I just have to ignore the conversations that are going on around me, and try to focus more on what my fingers are relaying to the screen.
It's not that I'm being rude, I'm just trying to focus on my goal of getting a post written everyday. True, the coworker that is distracting me the most is talking about TV shows that I'm sort of interested in, and haven't had time to watch. Now that I've heard the summary I probably won't watch it now. Wonder if I was ever going to take time out to watch Supernatural. The series is still going? I thought it was done with Season 5 when they got the rings from the four horsemen. Oh dear, I just asked my Newfie coworker to explain something. This could take awhile. Ah, he's talking with another coworker now, perhaps he won't notice me getting back to my writing.
Crap. Another coworker just walked in. I'm going to have to finish this later.
Today's lunch break just wasn't as quiet and serene as usual.
What's this? The forecast is to be cold, stormy, and miserable? For the next three days? This could work to my advantage! Just need to get some playtime with my daughter to wear her out, and then I'll be able to sit down and write. For select periods of time.
I'll take what I can get.
Thursday, January 06, 2011
Movie Project – Day 11: Fantasia (1940)
Today, we ventured for something more ambitious, Walt Disney's Fantasia. Erini has heard classical music before, but animation matched to the music was a new experience for her. Amazingly enough, she sat still for the most of the picture. I would like to say that there is a certain part that she likes, but her attention has been rapt.
After the show was over, Erini's reaction was curious. She didn't ask to watch it again, but rather wanted to see, “the unicorns.” Her favourite part of Fantasia – by far – was Beethoven's Sixth, 'The Pastoral Symphony.' Caitlin was very pleased, as that's her favourite part too. My only regret is that I didn't watch the entire show with her, as they had started watching it before I got home from work today. Nevertheless, this looks like a winner, especially in regards to rewatchability.
Most of the time I don't really notice the remastering of the image, but the Blu-Ray quality did show through, especially in the final piece, Night on Bald Mountain/Ave Maria. The fact that I had figured out how to get 1080i quality out of the Blu-ray player also helped, but the animation was very sharp and beautiful. I'm sure Walt would approve.
An interesting story that emerged from watching Fantasia with my family was an event from my wife's dating history. For all I know, she told me this before, but she showed Fantasia to one of her previous boyfriends (when they were dating, of course) because he had never seen it before. To his surprise, he actually enjoyed it, especially the music as he was not familiar with classical works.
I'm very glad that we bought Fantasia, although I was a little tenacious when Caitlin added it to our Boxing Day shopping pile. This is a title that I have been looking to get for close to a decade, but money is money, and over Christmas we spent a lot of it. Still, this is more than a movie, it's an investment in the musical and artistic education of my family. I can see us watching this again and again years from now.
Hopefully the disc will last. Hmmm... Might have to invest in some back up space.
After the show was over, Erini's reaction was curious. She didn't ask to watch it again, but rather wanted to see, “the unicorns.” Her favourite part of Fantasia – by far – was Beethoven's Sixth, 'The Pastoral Symphony.' Caitlin was very pleased, as that's her favourite part too. My only regret is that I didn't watch the entire show with her, as they had started watching it before I got home from work today. Nevertheless, this looks like a winner, especially in regards to rewatchability.
Most of the time I don't really notice the remastering of the image, but the Blu-Ray quality did show through, especially in the final piece, Night on Bald Mountain/Ave Maria. The fact that I had figured out how to get 1080i quality out of the Blu-ray player also helped, but the animation was very sharp and beautiful. I'm sure Walt would approve.
An interesting story that emerged from watching Fantasia with my family was an event from my wife's dating history. For all I know, she told me this before, but she showed Fantasia to one of her previous boyfriends (when they were dating, of course) because he had never seen it before. To his surprise, he actually enjoyed it, especially the music as he was not familiar with classical works.
I'm very glad that we bought Fantasia, although I was a little tenacious when Caitlin added it to our Boxing Day shopping pile. This is a title that I have been looking to get for close to a decade, but money is money, and over Christmas we spent a lot of it. Still, this is more than a movie, it's an investment in the musical and artistic education of my family. I can see us watching this again and again years from now.
Hopefully the disc will last. Hmmm... Might have to invest in some back up space.
Wednesday, January 05, 2011
Are you Stressed?
Much like yesterday's post a day question regarding the preference of talk or text, this question has multiple levels to its answer. The shortest answer would be either yes or no, in my case yes, but there is more to it than just being stressed.
The engineer side of me wants to get into the direct physical definition of the question, in which I would be under stress if my body was applying force to a vector of opposite direction, such as holding my daughter up in the superman position. My arm would be under compression, a classification of stress.
Wow, that was a boring explanation.
Mental and emotional stresses are a much more common definition and I am under those as well. Anyone in my position of husband, father, and breadwinner obviously has stressors in their lives, and my life is no different. I don't need to worry about where our next meal is going to come from, or if we'll have money for rent, but I do worry if I'm being responsible enough, and if I'm trying hard enough to provide adequately for my family.
Writing this out makes me realize that my stress is not near what other people feel. One of my coworkers is looking for a home right now, and is currently rooming with a friend of his. He shares a bachelor suite with him, though the way he describes it, he lives in a room with a bed and toilet. They just got a shower curtain the other day, so they have privacy when they shower now.
My family is currently rooming with my in-laws, so we don't technically have a home of our own, we still have our space. Though I wonder about how my daughters' antics are affecting everyone's sleep. Last night my oldest fell asleep in my lap at 8pm. So cute! I put her in her bed, jeans and all, but around midnight she awoke, changed into pajamas, and they remained awake for another hour. I was so tired I didn't hear the alarm this morning. At least not the first one. Or the second. Or the third. Or the fourth. I did hear the fifth time the alarm went off, but if it wasn't for my wife informing me of the hour, I probably would not have gotten out of bed today.
Am I stressed? Yes. Will I buckle under the pressure of mundane life? No. Will my stress get worse? My oldest is only 3 years old. Ask me again in ten years.
The engineer side of me wants to get into the direct physical definition of the question, in which I would be under stress if my body was applying force to a vector of opposite direction, such as holding my daughter up in the superman position. My arm would be under compression, a classification of stress.
Wow, that was a boring explanation.
Mental and emotional stresses are a much more common definition and I am under those as well. Anyone in my position of husband, father, and breadwinner obviously has stressors in their lives, and my life is no different. I don't need to worry about where our next meal is going to come from, or if we'll have money for rent, but I do worry if I'm being responsible enough, and if I'm trying hard enough to provide adequately for my family.
Writing this out makes me realize that my stress is not near what other people feel. One of my coworkers is looking for a home right now, and is currently rooming with a friend of his. He shares a bachelor suite with him, though the way he describes it, he lives in a room with a bed and toilet. They just got a shower curtain the other day, so they have privacy when they shower now.
My family is currently rooming with my in-laws, so we don't technically have a home of our own, we still have our space. Though I wonder about how my daughters' antics are affecting everyone's sleep. Last night my oldest fell asleep in my lap at 8pm. So cute! I put her in her bed, jeans and all, but around midnight she awoke, changed into pajamas, and they remained awake for another hour. I was so tired I didn't hear the alarm this morning. At least not the first one. Or the second. Or the third. Or the fourth. I did hear the fifth time the alarm went off, but if it wasn't for my wife informing me of the hour, I probably would not have gotten out of bed today.
Am I stressed? Yes. Will I buckle under the pressure of mundane life? No. Will my stress get worse? My oldest is only 3 years old. Ask me again in ten years.
Talk or Text?
Following the suggestion from the Wordpress post of the day suggestion, “Do you prefer to talk or text?” I would have to say that it truly does depend. If it's something critical, like my house is on fire, or my daughter has been injured, I would much prefer to be called. Text messages are something that I check frequently because I get twitter feeds sent to my phone, so I'm usually checking my phone throughout the day for tweets/texts. When Caitlin texts me, half the time I don't notice. If I could figure out a way to get a different notification sound for texts that don't come from twitter, I would probably prefer texting more, since it's cheaper. With talking, during the day, it's quite expensive, but in the evening it's cheap for Caitlin and I. Again, it all depends on the situation.
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